The other day @lovingslut pointed out that people confuse those two. Some seem to mistake lust for some deep emotion.
I know that I have made this mistake as well. I even have taken lust as a substitute for love. Hoping that one will lead to the other. Well guess what, it never did.
The moment the lust was gone, nothing was left. But when it came with love, there still was something inside me. Lust is amazing, but feeling loved is even better.
As I started my journey into BDSM and after some years and experiences, I came to a question. Do I want lust or love?
Do I want to be emotional with my Dom? Do I want to feel loved and share my love? Knowing that in the end it will hurt. Because it always does.
Or do I want lust? Do I want my Dom to be just that, a man who is a Dominant? And have no emotional connection with him?
Both have a good and a bad side.
Am I able to get over another broken heart?
Can I be with someone who stimulates my submissive side, but I don’t feel really attracted to?
Can I love a man who maybe won’t love me?
Can I give someone I don’t love all the passion he deserves?
All this questions are in my head. And I have no answer for any of it.
Being emotionally involved with someone is hard for me. I am insecure and I can get jealous.
Having no feelings might mean that I will keep looking for what I miss.
The biggest question is probably: Can I live without D/s? Of course I can. For over a year I had no desire for it. But now it’s back.
Do I want to live without it? No.
How do I solve this problem? Is there a middle way? I don’t know. I guess I will have to see what will come.