The written word

The written word

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I love it.
More than watching a movie, listening to music and sometimes even more than sleeping.

I started reading books when I was 12 years old. Once a week I went to the public library, which was around the corner from my house, and got myself a book. Either a novel or on a subject that was interesting to me.

In school I was one of the few students who read outside of school and enjoyed writing essays.

As life moved on, I found less time to read. I still try and make time, but I usually can’t just sit on the couch all day with a book in my hand.
My love for writing though has showed many sides of me.
At some point I wrote love letters for my friends, which they passed on as their own.
I wrote for a magazine. I wrote short stories.

Just like reading it allowed me to be in a different world. But by writing I was able to create a world of my own.

For the last couple of years, my passion of reading and writing became erotica. As can be found on this blog.
I can live out my fantasies here. And am very happy to have the possibility to write.

This is why I especially enjoy getting tasks that include me writing. Once I find where to start, I can write on and on
Lately, as I have been talking to several potential Doms, I have developed a new feeling when it comes to writing.
When I am asked to write a story, I question myself:”Does he want me to write it, so that he can get to know me better or simply to get aroused?”
I am not sure what triggered that, but I am feeling used. And not in a good way.
Maybe because I’ve been through a couple of guys and it never worked out. Or maybe it is simply me being a bi insecure and questioning everything.

Two days ago Nima gave me a task. To write a story. I have the beginning in my head. I know where I want my story to go from there. Yet, I am having trouble writing it.
Do I think that I’m being used by him? No.
Do I feel insecure and am not sure this is real? Also, no.

Where do I go from here?
I’m hoping that I will get over it after the first couple of sentences and will be able to finish the story.
Because deep down I know that my love for writing is bigger than my fear of whatever it is I’m feeling.

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