Do you know that scene in the movie “The Secretary”? The one where she is visiting her sister and they have dinner? She is on the phone with him, telling him that they have porter house steak, mashed…. no, creamed potatoes, green peas, iced tea and ice cream.
He is sitting in his kitchen. He takes a second and tells her she can have a scoop of creamed potatoes and a bit of butter and four peas and as much ice cream as she likes.
It has always been one of my favourite scenes from that movie. You can see how aroused she gets, when he says “four peas”. You can almost feel her submission. That kind of control and power exchange always appealed to me.
As I watched that part of the movie on YouTube, I also came across a scene where they are sitting and he has something little in his hand, holds it out for her and feeds it to her.
Somehow that scene went pretty unnoticed.
Being fed or feeding someone seems very sensual to me. Even more so when blindfolds are involved. Or at least that’s how it seems. But it’s nothing I have experienced a lot. And the few times that I did, I don’t recall enjoying it too much.
Up until a few days ago, I haven’t thought of being fed as a kink.
My first reaction was that it’s nothing I would enjoy much. But, instead of simply moving on from that thought, I wondered why that is.
Why wouldn’t I enjoy it?
Is it, because I might not like the food or am I afraid that too much food would be put in my mouth?
No, the answer is simple. It’s about giving up control.
It’s about a struggle I have so often. On the one hand I want to give up control, on the other hand I love being in control. Being in control calms me down, most of the time.
Being fed is a way of being not in control. And I’m not sure I am there yet. But I have enough trust to try.