Never Have I Ever…
…played (d/s – obviously) or had sex while I couldn’t hear anything.
And I’m not about to start. Yet, that is just an example from the current #NoTrueWay.
For the Dominant: Create a sense of fear!
It is eloborated a bit more what is meant by it and if you wish, you can go and read it all here.
There are two different parts I’d like to write about. The quote tells the dominant to create a sense of fear and the example it gives is putting on loud music or depriving the submissive of any other of their sense or even more than one.
I have a huge problem with sense deprivation. I mean, I don’t mind being restrained and not able to move. Even blindfolds work for me. That can be quite enjoyable. Wearing a gag and not being able to speak can be fun, and also prevent me from saying things that will get me into trouble. But there are things that are on my limit list that I know simply make me panic.
For example having to wear earphones or something like that so I don’t hear what is happening. When it’s two things combined, it freaks me out. Not being able to hear and so, or not see and move. So being deprived of my senses will definitely create fear. But not in a good way.
Here’s a tricky thing. I love pushing and finding out how far I can go, until the look in his eyes changes and he gets serious. That is hot and yes, maybe there’s fear about what is to come. But I don’t think fear is the right word.
Fear is different. Fear is being scared, afraid, panicking. Fear has no place in a relationship. Anticipation of what is to come and the surprise when it does are good things. Respect and love. But never fear. Even if it’s “just” a d/s relationship, with no love – fear has no place.
When I read the quote and the article connected to it, many different lights lit up inside me. And I know that sense deprivation is a personal limit and I’m sure there are people out there who are totally into it. But the other part that tells one person to create fear for the other, is simply wrong.