Never Have I Ever….
…thought I’d change my mind about that one limit.
Don’t get me wrong, I know that limits can change. Things that were OK before can become a new limit and then change back. That happened for me with face slapping. I also know that things one always had as a limit can stop being one.
But some things are set in stone, so to say. I’d never get a tattoo, especially in a d/s or relationship context or do branding. It’s just not me. Nothing wrong with that. And obviously, nothing wrong with people who do the things I wouldn’t.
What am I trying to say? To be honest, I’m not talking about one limit, but two. In my mind they seem connected. As I mentioned in my post yesterday I’m getting some things done to me in order stop pain that shouldn’t be there.
One of the things is acupuncture. It’s alright. It’s boring mostly, because I have to lie there for 15 to 20 minutes and can’t move much. With needles stuck in me. I don’t mind needles. I’m not thrilled about needles, but I don’t panic or can’t look when a needle is stuck in me. Often I try to actually have a look when it happens. That might be connected to my need to be in control.
On Friday I had some other procedures done. One of them also involved needles. I was injected with medicine at many spots on my higher back. It was different. It wasn’t just one sting. One sting followed the one before. Pain – relief – pain. You get the idea.
For the rest of the day that part of my back was tender and of course I kept looking into the mirror and checking out my back. And I smiled.
Here’s what part of my back looked like:
That reminded me of a thought I had in the end of October. I’m not sure what brought that thought on, but suddenly it was there. I started to become curious about knife play. Meaning, I thought to myself “I want to try that!” and I was quite shocked by that thought. Knives were always a huge NO WAY!
I couldn’t put into words really until Friday. The thoughts and sensation and tenderness and curiosity became stronger. And then I read Michael’s post for #NoTrueWay. In it he mentions knife play. That must be a sign, if one would believe in such a thing.
Never Have I Ever…
…thought I’d say/write the following sentence:
I want to learn more about and try knife and needle play.
Whether I’ll actually do that is a very different thing. So stay tuned.