According to the Rules

According to the Rules

similar cubes with rules inscription on windowsill in building
Photo by Joshua Miranda on

Oh, today’s 30 days of d/s topic I like a lot!

Some rules determine behavior in public, others are about private behavior. Some rules may be more common but there’s no right or wrong here. Do you know what kind of rules you may want or need in your relationship?

I like rules.
That’s not true. I love rules.

As long as they make sense to me and work in my everyday life and I agree and and and.

Ok, let’s be a bit more serious here.
I do like rules and I like following them and it is important to me that they mean as much to my dom as they do to me. What is the point of rules when it doesn’t matter whether I follow them or not? If I get the feeling that he doesn’t care, I stop enjoying them and doing them.

I have had many different rules in the different relationships I had. Most of them had some sexual element to them. Whether it’s a pic of my panties or when and if I’m allowed to have an orgasm.
In the past d/s was first and foremost about sex. Rules about other things in my life were complicated and still are.
That has changed though and I am enjoying it. There are things in my daily life he has control over and I never thought it to be possible or practical.

Where there’s a will, there’s a way I guess. We work around things and see what is realistic and what to do in various situations.
Some of the rules he has wished for, some were requested by me. I trust him to not be unreasonable and he trust me to actually follow the rules, while we are LDR.

I like rules because they make me feel connected to him, when I can’t be. Whether it’s because of daily life or the distance. It reminds me of our d/s and our commitment to each other.
I know, I have written about it before. Rules also make sure we’ll stay in contact. There are things I ask for on a daily basis or send him reports about it. It helps when not being together.

Some of the rules we have are to help me with something. Whether it’s a reminder to eat when I’m busy of not to forget putting on my jewellery before leaving for the office. And it makes him part of my life and the little things.
Not all rules work out. Some seem like a good idea, but soon become impractical. That is the reason we always talk about rules. How do they work? How do they makes us feel?

Whenever either of us wants to implement a new rule, we give it a trail period of a week. Does that rule actually work on real life and not just in our fantasy? Are there adjustments and modifications need to be made? Does it work for both of us?
All those are very important things to think about and talk about.
It doesn’t make any sense to have rules that are unrealistic or either of us can’t ever live up to.

Rules, just like everything else in d/s, can always change. And that is the beauty of d/s, I believe.

Learn more about the 30 Days of D/S at LovingBdsm

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